Today I attended a memorial service for a friend I met while we were undergrads in 1994. I was drawn to her because of the band names she’d doodled on her notebook. Classic.

We were in the same major. I was always glad to have her in class. She was very intelligent, and wicked funny. We collaborated together so seamlessly even group projects were bearable.

After graduation, and celebrating at a joint graduation party, for which her mom baked an awesome cake decorated as a replica of our graduation announcements, we both went off to law school in San Francisco. At the time I didn’t know anyone else in the city I came to call home for 15 years. She and I had many adventures together.

While gassing up for some adventure I was washing my car windows. My friend, in her signature booming voice, said, “If this law school thing doesn’t work out you can always wash windows.” As heads turned from every direction in earshot my embarrassed reaction prompted a full belly laugh from her.

She had my second favorite laugh of anyone I have ever known. My favorite was my brother.

Now they’re both gone.

Through the years we attended many concerts together. I’ve never met a bigger Prince fan. Before cell phones or social media she knew how to find out where the after-show was. She made going on adventures in parts of town I where would be uncomfortable in the daytime seem like a good idea. It always turned out great, if not epic.

When news on certain subjects arose I could count on chatting about it with her. More likely she would be the one to break the news to me. I miss talking with her so much about politics, justice, and the law. I always appreciated her perspective and thoughtful consideration.

As much as she was dialed in to politics and the law she was an expert in pop music. Her tastes were broad and varied. When she loved she dove deep.

If she knew I loved something she would keep it on her radar. There wasn’t a Jimmy Carter or U2 story that she didn’t check in with me about.

I still cannot bring myself to listen to the new Pearl Jam album and I couldn’t bear to go to a show on this tour. She and I saw them together countless times.

There are so many other aspects to her life I admired or found intriguing. In addition to having a successful career, she was fiercely loyal, lived mostly in the moment, sent thoughtful (PAPER!) notes, loved tennis (especially her favorite, Rafa), probably owned every Hello Kitty item ever created, and went out of her way to arrange gifts and surprises for loved ones.

I hope she’s laughing somewhere with her beloved Nana Banana and listening to great music.